Dating in this day and age is not for the weak.
You are competing with an endless stream of online profiles, and seeing all those successful couples on social media isn’t helping our self-esteem or perception of what’s normal either.
In fact, dating does feel like scrolling on social media sometimes. Everyone has an online persona, you’re only spending a few seconds on each person and judge them mostly by their profile photos, only to move to the next in no time.
All that, paired with an immense pressure of finding the right person and building the right type of the relationship can seriously damage your mental state and defer you from dating altogether.
Dating doesn’t have to be so chaotic and stressful though. Explorationship is a genius way out.
What is Explorationship, Exactly?
Usually, when someone is about to start dating and signs up on a dating platform, they’re required to enter their goals or plans. For example, are you here to find a sex partner, a casual relationship, or a future spouse? Most dating apps try to get to the bottom of your motivation with additional questions or filters they push on you.
And even if you’re not dating online or being interrogated by those questions in the app, you are thinking about your preferences and plans for dating.
Explorationship takes a different approach.
Instead of making you choose what you want here and now, it suggests you simply dive into the world of dating and see where it takes you.
The concept is new but it’s already gaining momentum with Flure pioneering this freeing approach that helps individuals reduce anxiety and avoid the pressures of classic love-seeking journeys.
The idea is really simple, but thanks to its core principles it combats the main downsides of modern dating that ruin the experience for so many users.
- No pressure or commitment from the start
- Intuitive and effortless connections without expectations
- Living in the moment instead of focusing on the outcome
Explorationship allows humans to not know what they want before they even go on a single date or match with a single person online. In a world that’s so focused on having goals, plans, and targets figured out immediately when you decide to do something, being able to say “I don’t know what I want, and I will go with the flow to find out” feels like a luxury.
Is Explorationship for Everyone?
There is no one-size-fits-all in dating.
Everyone’s circumstances are unique, and while someone may feel like a huge weight has been lifted off their shoulders with explorationships, others will struggle to see and experience the perks of it.
Having said that, we all would benefit from being a little bit less controlling and goal-oriented when it comes to romance.
For starters, uncovering what you want, and not what is pushed down on you by society, is pretty hard. It takes a lot of unlearning and practicing before you can shake off the notion of having to know why you’re dating before you even start.
Moreover, you can’t really tell that you want this particular thing unless you’ve dated a bit and seen what else is out there.
The bottom line is, that there’s nothing stopping you from trying exploration and switching back to the traditional dating format if you don’t like it. In fact, that is the expected successful outcome of an explorationship – you learn about your true dating goals through trial and error and choose a particular relationship format that works for you.
How to Make the Most of Explorationship
Explorationship is pretty laid-back and relaxed, so you don’t have to follow any specific rules to take part in it.
However, there are ways to make this experience better for you and everyone else around you.
- Let the other person know you’re figuring it out. Not everyone will be cool with you free-floating and seeing where it takes you, so it’s best to give your matches a head-up so they don’t feel blindsided.
- Explorationship doesn’t mean situationship. You’re allowed to be on a journey of figuring out your romantic preferences, but you can’t play with other people’s feelings by sending mixed signals. It’s rude and inappropriate, no matter how you try to twist it.
- Don’t give in under pressure. If you meet someone you like and they try to persuade you to put a label on your relationship, don’t do it out of fear of losing them. Unless you’re ready to move on to something else, stay strong and don’t cave in. If they’re the right person for you, they’ll be understanding and wait. If not, well, you’ll find someone else who will make you happy.
- Explore different formats of relationships. You don’t have to jump straight into polyamory but being open to different dynamics and arrangements will help you learn more about yourself and become a better partner.
- Date people outside of your type. Just like you would benefit from trying new dating formats, you will also have a great time if you say Yes to dating outside of your traditional type. People who come from different backgrounds and look differently than we’re used to are just as good if not better romance partners.
Final Thoughts
The way we date is changing thanks to new technology and evolution of how we live. There’s no reason why we should stick to dating rules that were set decades and hundreds of years ago.
Relationships, and the path to them, don’t have to follow a certain pattern. Choose your own peace and needs, give explorationship a go, and change the trajectory of how you date forever.
